SINISTER

Friday, October 31, 2014

Sabotage saccharine salvation
Insist illegitimate ignition
Normalize nasty negotiation
Idolize immoral inscription
Safeguard sadistic sanctions
Traumatize travelers to
trepidation
Escape eloquent emasculation
Revive repressed retribution

SINISTER.......I pay no heed
I thrive in sin, deadly deed
Ya i am a sinister indeed....

म के गर्दिन ?


ओठमा लाली लगाइ
मुस्कान को जाल हान्छु
कर्के आँखा को हेराइ ले
छक्याउछु, झुक्याउछु
सुमधूर संगीत सगै
काम को बाण हान्छु
तिमीलाई लोव्याउछु
सपना देखाउछु
तिमीलाई भुलाउछु, तर आफुलाई जोगाउछु
भुमरी मा पर्दिन
म के गर्दिन ?

वास्तबिक्ता को पर्दा लगाइ
बेहोसीनै तुल्याउछु
फकाउछु, कुराउछु
तिमीलाई सिध्याउछु
खल्ती पनि रित्याउछु
तिमी आउछौ, म लुक्छु
पछी पछी लगाउछु
गल्लीको कुकुरझै तिमी
रियाल काढी पुछर हल्लाउछौ
म हेर्छु, म हास्छु
एक टुक्रा दान दियी
मेरै पछी दौडाउछु
तिम्रो अस्तित्व लियी
खुड्किला चडछु
अह तल झर्दिन
म के गर्दिन ?

वास्नाको जन्जिरले बेरिएको
एउटा पुत्ला हौ तिमी
जती तर्कु, जती झर्कु
लुरु लुरु आउछौ
ढोका मा ढुक्छौ
मेरै गूण गाउछौ
मुर्ख हौ तिमी...पटमुर्ख
कती स्वाभिमान रित्याउछौ?
तर
जती तिमी रितिन्छौ
तेती म भर्पूर हुन्छु
तिमीलाई खोक्रो पार्छु
अनी वास अन्तै सार्छु
मुहान सुकेपछी खडेरी मा
फर्केर नि हेर्दिन
म के गर्दिन ?

माया मा पर्दिन, ममता छर्दिन
तर माया गर्छु
जब सम्म आट छ
कसैसँग गाठ छ
तेही बाटो रोज्छु
एउटालाई खोज्छु
भुमरीमा पार्छु
अनी जाल हाल्छु
हो म मान्छु, म गलत छु
तर के अरु स ही छन?
अह! म पछी सर्दिन
म के गर्दिन ?
म के गर्दिन ?

यो कस्तो सम्बन्ध?


पाइला पाइलामा आँशुले सेचिएको
झुठ र अहन्कारले नाटक नै रचिएको
प्रश्नचिन्हित एउटा व्यङ्यात्मक निबन्ध
यो कस्तो सम्बन्ध?

माया पनि सोचेर लगाएझैँ
खडेरीको भेलले बगाएझैँ
अस्मिताको विचित्र द्वन्द
यो कस्तो सम्बन्ध?

नैरश्यको नमुना बनाएझैँ
अत्तर मुनी अस्तित्व गनाएझैँ
शिष्टाचार निर्हित छन्द
यो कस्तो सम्बन्ध?

दुई बिन्दू जोडेर हेरेँ
फेरी त्यसलाई तोडेर हेरेँ
वास्तविक्तालाई गरेर बन्द
यो कस्तो सम्बन्ध?

प्रकृतिको छ बेग्लै सुगन्ध
पुरुषलाई लोभ्याउने छ प्रबन्ध
तैपनी मिलन किन यस्तो मन्द
यो कस्तो सम्बन्ध?
खै यो कस्तो सम्बन्ध?

Broken string

The keyboard gave me a cue
and the drum started beating
but i kept staring at my broken
string
The soothing pianoforte rocked
my hungry soul
and the unruly beat of drum was
what i was waiting for
But when i tried my own
symphony
i failed to come up with a melody
my hands lay limp, my fingers
failed me
The music inside me screamed
for an outlet
i cried in agony, with the pain in
my nerves
Oh! have mercy.......I begged, I
sobbed
I searched my soul knocked out
my dreams
yet nothing came out of it
de-da-da-dum-da-da-dum-ding
the drum started beating
yet i kept staring at my broken
string

Like a dog in the backyard i rolled
i barked
i wagged my tail at familiar faces
i grabbed at the bits and pieces
thrown at me
and gobbled down the remains
without mercy
But when i was asked or urged to
howl
to show them how loud i could be
i just gave them a bleak look
even the thorn in my paw
couldn't help me
something was lost,broken inside
i could hear no sound...................
Yet I stood there and lied.....
"I can do it. Of course I can
just wait I'll show you", I cried
I waited and waited for my
conscience to scream
The keyboard gave me a cue
and the drum started beating
But like a dumbstruck silhouette
I kept staring at my broken
string.......

Mirrors


oh gee
look at me
tell me
what you see
a nerdy nerd, a willow bird
scarred, marred nilly drunkard
I have had
had it all
a bout and a heavy clout
a time
to shout and run about
its a past bob
now i am a cast off
with a gout and rocking cough
i am a willy
a nilly
a brandmarked silly
my unruly curl
now a cap of snowfall
a lopsided grin
wrinkled skin
i remember i recall
how I've been
i stare at it
at my image
a sage
could have been at this age
yet
i am me
albeit rumpled
crumbled
stumbled
thoroughly tumbled
i look at him
oh! so prim
he looks at me
with look so grim
in between
is a silver screen
past i recall
present i stall
i fall i crawl
between then and now
WOW
like a bouncing ball
oh mirrors........mirrors on the
wall

The silence stretch out a long
way
and all i can do is reminisce
the future remains unpredictable
and the past is all i can talk about
present is lost in the shadow of
past
and misty future is tagging along
it
i keep swinging between then
and now
seeking pleasure in the changes
the gleam of mischief is lost
somewhere
and lacklusture beads
acknowledge me
i run my fingers at the plain
screen
the image appraise me with a
mocking grin
oh mirrors..........mirrors on the
wall

oh look
look at me
tell me
what you see
a spook, a dried up brook
a severe crook, a wounded rook
i have had
had it all
a thirst to quench
and a comely wench
a heartfelt brunch
a lovely punch
its a past bob
now i am a cast off
i am a hollow bin
a rusty tin
sledge
with rocking edge
yet
i can see
the child in me
what i used to be
beneath
this wrinkled sheath
lies a myth
of all that shit
cheat
and bruising beat
that i insist
to remember
for
my past is cool
future
is death
that i wish to embrace
with grace
no trace
will be left of mine
and time
goes on and on
for someone
I'll be gone
i run my fingers at the plain
screen
the image regard me with a
mocking grin
oh mirrors...........mirrors on the wall.

Define friendship

friendship
seems like a delusion
an exasperating illusion
a mere diffusion
of common grounds and season
integrated reasons
articulated traditions
a mere mission
of integrations.

Aashraya


असीमित असम्भाव्यता
अनुचित आत्मियता
अनिश्चित अस्मीता र
अनगिन्ति असमानता
देखि अनभिग्य छु म ।

आक्रोशित अलङ्कार
अशुनिश्चित आधार
आलोचित आकार र
अनियमित अन्धकार
देखि आचीत छु म ।

आओ असङ्ख्य आसहरु
तिमीमा नै आस्रित छु म